I'm afraid to talk about how well it's going because it might change. I'm afraid to think about what happens when we are done and we have no home waiting for us in Arizona. I'm afraid to tell everyone the changes in my family and in myself since we got here, lest they think we might abandon them back home in favor of staying in Utah.
A side effect of OIT for my son has been increased self confidence, becoming more social and lessened anxiety. My heart has leapt with joy over watching him acclimate to his surroundings more times than I care to admit because...those things didn't happen at home. They didn't happen in Arizona and he knows it. He begs every day not to go back. He says his friends will visit him and that will be fine.
I try not to think too hard about friendships that didn't cross the distance with us. I try to hang on to the dear friends who still text, call and send us goodies in the mail. I hope the others will at least resume to normalcy when we return and I remind myself that 9 times out of10, it's just not about me.
I'd be lying to say our family didn't need a shake up...something revolutionary that goes beyond just this treatment. We knew from the beginning that we would not come out on the other side of this the same. It's a good thing.
Image courtesy of Shellyart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
At the end of the day, this is us, stripped bare. No brand new house in perfect suburbia. No pretenses. No one to impress. No shuttling kids from class to activity. This is just simply a family of four, loving one another day in and day out, being thankful for each other while trying to maintain our sanity. Lord knows, even in the best of times, 24/7 with those littles I birthed and love with my entire soul, is intense. Add to that, a part of us 700 miles away. We don't have time for the frivolous and unnecessary. Life is totally simple and completely complicated right now.
